Life, Cooking and Lessons!

Life ! (Picture courtesy: Google images!)

We cook everyday. Some days are good, a few bad. And then, a few other is all special. Today, I have been through some deeper thoughts. While cooking pasta, was watching the veggies all cook together with the spices. A thought struck me. It just made perfect sense to relate that to life.

Our life is also like cooking a new recipe. We are all like those different ingredients. Ingredients won't really be good and tasty as it is. Except for a very few ones, all ingredients will taste better when blended with others. It is just like blending our thoughts and minds with meeting new people around and forming new bonds. I look at this part of meeting and forging new relationships as the form of making delicious and scrumptious recipes!  We could picture each of us with a nature that could be related to say, spices, veggies, greens, fruits, herbs, proteins, and what not?

When we cook together, each ingredient brings out its strength and the other tries to camouflage the weakness and thus bringing out new flavors and taste.  It is like forming relationships. Sometimes, it is awesome and an instant hit and other times, the worst nightmare! That is what happens at times. Compare it with even marriage- that is what happens when we start a family. We think we have the right person or family. It may or may not be right. It also depends when we meet and how we meet (equating that to the temperature, expiry dates and others!). We need the essentials like oil, salt, sugar and pepper to help make the recipes. I equate these essentials to the very essentials in life such as, love, smiles, memories, words, honesty, hope, trust, truth and others. Thus, blending in all these with the right ingredients helps us shape a perfect (or rather a great) recipe for life !  Of course, you could say that its all in the hands of a cook to make or break a recipe. We can be considered cooks ourselves, but more so, I would compare it with the Almighty. If we look at how we end up meeting people (or rather, choosing ingredients), we do get to choose some people but we don't get to choose a few others like our parents, siblings, relatives or even children. They all just happen right? We are meant to be related to these people or rather ingredients. It actually can be also connected to the "Chopped" show in Food Network channel.  They are given some recipes and allowed to take some extra and based on whatever they have and whatever they can choose from the available lot, they end up making a lovely delicious new recipe. So, if we consider them in our life and our recipe, we need to adjust, sometimes try and form new recipes! We as one of the ingredient should try to bring out our best so that even if the rest doesn't get along and blend to form a good taste, may be we can try to bring our best and make it an edible and tasty one. And, trust me, sometimes we tend to be that one ingredient which people don't appreciate its worth but can't live without too and end up using it only for their use. However, all that matters is not losing our worth and being a wonderful ingredient (person-inside out) that can't be forgotten and will be appreciated at least eventually.  Don't y'all agree?

Another analogy that I saw while cooking was that it is like the hard and nice life. If we imagine us cooking on a hot stove, isn't it like the hardships that we face as we evolve ? Sometimes, for a few those hardships are interesting and actually fun. It could be burning hot, super cold like a blast chiller or even blanching- sudden rush of hot and then cold! However, that is how life helps us shape better! 

Well, anyways, hope the recipes I cook (or am a part of ) are all healthy and delicious! I wish the same for you guys too!

Anyways, hope life is not just bland and is spicy,sweet, sour and happy !

Take care.

Why do we have prejudice and why do we generalize ?

Why?Picture courtesy: http://qh11e10.wordpress.com/2013/03/

I have been reading a lot of research on racial identification and discrimination issues, socio economic issues and others. It is strange that even in 21st century and that too post 2010 period we are still talking about it ! It makes me wonder what has happened to human mind, or rather the rational and the emotional balance in human mind. Why do we give so much importance to the visually apparent skin tone or the looks? Does that race of a person define anything? People tend to think that race is biological, it is never so. What is in a color that makes one decide the goodness of a person ?

These thoughts have been bothering me for a while and off late, the readings for one of my favorite class (the new one I have taken this summer semester) has triggered more of the spark. Racial discrimination is something we think, we see in the west and far west (Europe and the US). However, that is not the fact. The discrimination in these places would be based on their ethnicity, color and race. Say, White, Black, Latinos, Hispanic, Asian-American and so on. If we look at India, it is going to be the north, south, east divide! It is also a big divide in terms of religion, caste, creed, and what not.

Yes, this is something that has been happening  for a long time now. Europeans appreciated only the fairer skin. If we think about our colonization, i.e. India, (Thanks to Dr. Fouts for having shared that insight) we see that when the Britishers and other Europeans who colonized our country, tended to favor the ones with lighter skin. Of course, i dont blame them for the start. It has now become a way of life. Every one wants to have a fairer skin and have a lovelier wife, child and what not? Despite the old image of a "tall, dark and handsome", we have now changed it to be a fair and handsome  guy!

We also, tend to generalize by just knowing a bit about someone or someone who represents the culture. It is ridiculous to even generalize. I remember the quote by G.B.Shaw, " “Crude classifications and false generalizations are the curse of organized life.” I have also seen people making remarks about a particular sect of people. Even in India, Indians from the northern part of India seem to think that those from the south all wear dhoti's, eat lot of rice, are boorish and only speak tamil! Well, no. There are many other states in the south of India. They have their own charm and beauty. They are also interesting people. Why this generalization? Is it because, people assume that if one does so, then the whole set of people who represent or share that culture can be similar to that one person whom you interacted with! Every culture, language and ethnicity has its own beauty and importance. It also has its share of quirks. It is in how we knit them well and enjoy the beauty not by just trying to assimilate in to it or making others adapt to ours!

Well, even though I have only mentioned the color and race as being the major reasons for discrimination, it is also obvious that there is a discrimination among the various social classes. There is difference among the lower and upper middle class, the rich, the poor and what not. And then, there is the differentiation among gender.

We must learn to practice "cultural humility."So, what is cultural humility?

It is a process of self-reflection, self-critique and commitment to understanding and respecting different points of view and engaging with others humbly (Tervalon & Murray-Garcia, 1998)

 

It is very disheartening to note that even the ones who are  educated and are well- traveled are never humble enough. Well, what are we trying to leave the younger generation with?

Please share your comments :) 

Things at my end....

I have always thought, I will be regular on my blog but it has not been possible. I pen many thoughts- both in my mind and on the page and leave it incomplete. I have wanted to share about how my very short break between summer courses and end of spring semester just raced past. I have been wanting to do a lot in between this period: a short break of almost 12-15 days. However, I don't even remember how I just forgot that I even had a break time!

We were able to take a short trip to Savannah, GA for two days and that was a beautiful trip. Two days in Savannah cannot be enough to complete the city so we would like to go back once again and enjoy the beautiful and oldest city of Georgia.Then, all set with the shifting arrangements to the new place. All the packing and setting up things took a while and by the time we could realize, my classes began. It is a new and intense course for summer as the entire course has to be completed with a month and the syllabus will need to cover what can be covered in 3 months. However, for the past couple of classes, I love this course and I love the topics and area we are covering. It is a wonderful and bright cohort.Yes, it is really intense with a lot of reading and I am not sure how i will be good enough in taking this through but I hope I do it well.

At our new place, we have a maple tree. The study room has a window that faces the tree and I am loving this spot even if i dont seem to be actually using this place for studying but for everything else:). I love to give a name to things and Arvind seems to be okay with that too. So, have named the tree "Kalpadruma" or "Kalpavraksha". Haha, yes, we know it is funny but we seem to like that idea and it feels nice to watch those little black birdies that hop around from various branches. These little things in life, help in painting the wall of life with some sweet and wonderful shades that even the big ones would not provide!

The one good thing about this summer season is that I will have some more time to work around at home and hence, more time to cook. I enjoy trying out some new ones and this second anniversary (yesterday) surprised my hubby with vegan apple cinnamon muffins. Yes, I enjoyed it thoroughly and I love the fact that I could actually get it done even with him around at home. It was a simple stay at home anniversary but we enjoyed every bit of it.

I am reading a book now called " The cute and the cool" by Gary Cross. It is a very interesting and good one, something I have been looking for a long time. I have a big list of books that I want to read quickly, a big  list of movies that I want to watch (Shame, I have not despite being a movie buff!).

Anyways, I have been thinking of ideas on how and what I can do to write every day on this page. So, have been dabbing with some ideas and may be soon, will incorporate that.:)

So, see yeah!

What did I learn after marriage?

Picture courtesy:www.lifehack.org

It has been a while. I have been running around with my school work and could not update my blog page. Even on my blog's birthday :) A happy 7 years. 

 So, why this topic?I have been married for nearly 2 years now and the last few months of my life has been stressful with loads of work to do. It is interesting how this has helped me understand better how important it is to have a great and supportive husband who is ready and is there for you. Thanks to Arvind, that I have completed my second semester. He has been an amazing husband and friend. Of course, just like every other relation: friend or spouse, we have had our differences and struggles. It is natural and we have been moving on with things. This got me thinking of writing a note on my lessons I learned from my marriage so far.

So, what does marriage mean? The dictionary meaning would say, the bond between the man and the woman (or same sex). However, I liked the point where it said, that it means a close and intimate relationship. Now, does it only mean a bond between the man and the wife? Yes, it is very important to have a good and very deep bonding between the man and the wife but it is also equally important for the families to bond. Yes, it is crucial. But, you never know what you will get in life. As quoted in the movie, Forrest Gump, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you will get." That is how it was for me, I did not know, I don't like the "milk chocolates" as much as i thought i would when i saw them! Nor did I think, i would love the "dark chocolates" as much as I did not appreciate it in the beginning. It is surely healthier! (Go, figure!) So, here are a few things I learned from my almost 2 year old marriage.

Things  I learned after marriage:

1. Things are never FAIR. Learn to adjust and move on. 
2. People talk. Let them. Do not WORRY. It is their "Karma". What goes around, comes around. So, just follow to your goal. 
3. Turn deaf ears. Sometimes, that is better. It will be (and always is) hard. But try your best to do that. 
4. Mother-in-laws will be mother-in-laws. They will be good mother-in-laws and may be (for a few) bad mother-in-laws. I, of course, changed my point of view that mother-in-laws could be also your mother! I had a different perception and thought mother-in-laws would be a  mother again, but I guess, I have had to change my opinion. It is not just with my own experience,but from what I have observed at other homes.  May be that is why, they are called "in-laws." (However, good you will be, things will not be that beautiful as it ll seem to be- a point for both sides of the equation!:)).It does not mean my mother-in-law is bad or is trouble but it surely brings out my reflections and thoughts on my interactions with many mother-in-laws, which includes mine!
5. Father-in-laws are always kinder and better good goodie souls. They will be nice, warm, funny, and no worries souls. Most often, they fall under the goodness side of the circle!This again is based on the interaction and observing others and mine.
6. You will never be short of problems and yes, the grass is greener on the other end (for all of us). 
7. If you love your husband and if he loves you truly, then you are safe and it is not much to worry.
8. Go for what your heart yearns, marriage is never to stop you (for both the spouses) from doing and living your life, it is in fact to help you shape your life better. You have to support each others decisions and stand by that. That will help the wheel of life just keep rolling straight and strong. 
9. Try and take a break once a while with your hubby dear (vice versa). Even when you have children, take a few days of break - just 2 days would do, all by yourself. It is essential to have a very healthy and strong relationship. 
10. Trust in the good God and trust that He will be there for helping you sail through this life smoothly and make it an enjoyable and beautiful journey. 

The list is probably longer but I thought I will keep it short and sweet. This is just my personal opinion. I am not voicing for any one else. It is not to point out to anyone in particular. I like this phase of my life and I am enjoying my time with my hubby. These are reflections of a young (so i would love to call myself :)) girl with her very young experience. I am sure, these will change with time and a decade from now, the post might sound different. However, I hope and I think, I will love my husband even more and better and may be we will be bond as better friends. I hope he does too (he better do ;)) ..lolz.Please, do note that it is not to point out or blame someone in my family or some other !

Anyways, this is my first post after my semester break:) 

Hoping to keep this going.

The puppet!

Picture courtesy: http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2007/01/dealing-with-manipulative-people.html

She smiled,
innocent and nice
They smiled back,
Faking...
Alas! She did not realize.
Everything just fell in place,
so fast and so quick,
that she did not reflect,
on her thoughts.

Conversations proved,
the "true" colors,
the changing skin and changing tone.
She swallowed her pride,
silently took it to her stride.

Now, -
she is family,
or so she is told.
thankful to her sweetheart,
she does feel "it" once in a while.
Rest of the time, she is all sore and hurt,
with words that look like honey coated spikes!

Trying to keep her cool,
she walks through their path.
The lies and manipulations,
she is done with that.
She feels like a puppet
all tied up and rocked.
She doesn't know where else to go,
or what else to do.
Now, all she has is the hand she held
and walked in to this home,
The hope,that it was meant to be
all good and bright.

May be it is time to just,
walk away-
bold and fearless.

May be it is time she gave it back,
stern and assertive,
she doesn't have much choice. 

But, then..may be........

Slithering evil

Courtesy: Google images:aroundtheworldwithmeblog

Evil snake has risen from hell,
Slithering around and killing for fun.
A little girl was found in its spell,
frightened and shivering
(i hope) She did survive from hell.
Will she even remember, what was it like,
To be cuddled, kissed and embraced in love?
Those slithering hands and the venomous touch has ripped out her soul and crushed
such a beautiful life.
Oh! you power-drunken fools,
You can only afford to smile for a little while
those alter egos and the boiling souls
are now on the rise.
The only way to crush the evil
Is to cut its ”tail” and burn it to death.
I wish, I wish and I wish this happens
For those evil stares and venomous hands
don’t deserve to be alive even in jail !!

Mid semester shocks and way of life....

Can you believe it is almost mid March! This semester seems to be like on roller skates. All I can remember is having stood on a pair of skates and now I am just zooming on my way and I cannot believe that I am just having a month and the rest of March in hand to complete the 2nd semester.
I am enjoying the semester in terms of the subjects / courses I have taken. Even though one of courses seemed very hard for me in the beginning, it is shaping up to be interesting and exciting. I of course, enjoy the Qualitative and the theory class the most. I am blessed with the best professor I can ever ask for in my life - Dr. Ronald. E. Taylor. I really like him so much that I sometimes see myself as "Dronacharya-Arjuna(and I being more of Ekalavya :))" kind of relationship with him. I always pray to God for him- he is a very genuine and wonderful person and a teacher and mentor par excellence.

Dr. Micheal Palenchar, who teaches the Qualitative Part I is also very genuine person and a deep thinker. I am waiting for the next Part II course in Qualitative research methods by yet another wonderful professor- Dr. Eric Haley.

Other than the course, the class seems to be interesting. I am enjoying working with Jinhee (my best buddy in this campus or rather in my department) on a paper that we hope to publish in AEJMC! The rest - remains the same way as it was last semester.

One fine day - Dr. Morisson with her pet

However, a pleasant day like today just did not last long. We were all shocked and shattered by the news we received. Our school's department head, Dr. Margie Morrison passed away. She was a very sweet and kind professor and I have had quiet a few interactions with her in the past semester. She in fact, always encouraged me and showed confidence in me. On Valentine's day, there was a pot luck in our department and she made some green bean soup and served it and she invited me and reminded me to have the soup. She also made sure that she told me what ingredients were used in cooking the various soups and food items the profs had brought that day so that I did not have any problem having the vegetarian ones.. She was such a nice lady.

Her death was a shocker as it was very unexpected. I am sure the department (my school) is very close knit and a wonderful department and this is surely something that no one would have been able to digest.I know she had a dog, a very handsome dog and she was very fond of him. He was an akita breed and was huge and cuddly.

I pray for her soul to rest in peace. I am still not able to take the news and it is sad. This is for you Dr. Morrison. Thank you for all that you did and have done for students like me. I am grateful to God to have joined such a wonderful school and great department.

Please share your prayers for her and pray for her family and friends.